Greater love has no one than this…
As little kids we used to play shoot ‘em-up games. Using toy guns, sticks, or even our fingers, we played elaborate shooting games in the neighborhood.
When shot by imaginary bullets, kids would go through fantastical theatrics in their dying.
Staggering, falling, and groaning, they would go to their imaginary death.
All of us have this fantasy idea of our death where like a cowboy movie, a loved one holds our heads in their laps and we give a last statement of love and hope to those around us. We all want a John Wayne, Ronald Regan, Audie Murphy, heroes’ death. Don’t remember those old stars? OK, so I’m dating myself.
Husbands, when asked if they would die to save their wives and families without a doubt, say yes.
Then these same husbands go on to argue, belittle, and cause pain and hardship for their spouses and children. They were willing to go to a glorious cowboy death but not willing to stop the small, petty habits that are slowly killing their wives and family.
This dying thing is more than movie theatrics; it is and must be a self-less act.
Dying to self is a daily task that must go on for a lifetime. Men especially have the vision of going out in a blaze of glory. This daily dying to self isn’t very dramatic or exciting.
Most arguments and turmoil in families and marriages have at the core an unwillingness to give up their personal “rights”.
Real love is a love where rights are given up, selfish desires put aside, and the desire to honor the other is at the core.
Dying for another is not a childhood game; it is a serious matter of self-sacrifice that must be renewed daily.
That’s what real love is.
What are some ways that you could prove to your spouse and family that you love them?
Are you doing those things now? Have you done them in the past?
What is the cost of those acts of love? (Time, energy, money)
Love is a daily decision. Decide to continue those things that prove your love every, day.
This is an excerpt from my book,
A 30 Day Biblical Approach to Love
Frank J Walker LMFT
1617 Main Street
Cambria, Ca. 93428
Frank’s books are available @